Spitefic: Sands Takes the Wheel

[das-mervin.livejournal.com]

Title: Sands Takes the Wheel
Author: das_mervin
Fandom(s): New Moon/Once Upon a Time in Mexico
Rating: R
Word Count: 660
Inspiration: Written in response to Bella constantly trying to blame herself for everything that happened in chapter one and two of New Moon.
Warnings: Strong language.
Summary: Sands has a bit of a tantrum and uses Edward to express himself, and since when has he ever given a rat’s ass about characterization, right?
Author’s Note: This is technically a crossover and a self-insert, seeing as Sands inserted himself into Edward. *shakes head* I couldn't talk him out of it. So, here it is.

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Edward suddenly slammed hard on the brakes. I jerked forward in the seat, shrieking once and startled by the sudden movement, my head snapping so hard I nearly got whiplash. I righted myself when the truck came to a complete screeching halt, mouth open to demand just what he was doing, but snapped it shut again when I saw the furious and fiery gaze he was giving me.

“Forgive you?” he ground out. “Forgive you for what? For being a complete and utter doormat?” He slammed his hands on the steering wheel. “What the fuck is there to forgive you, you braindead bitch?! Am I supposed to forgive you for having blood? Oh, go right ahead and beg for my forgiveness because you have skin that is just like every other goddamn person on the planet!”

“Edward!” I spluttered. “That’s not—this was all—”

“You say it’s your fault and I’ll bash your brains in. I’ll bash ‘em right the fuck in!” As I gaped soundlessly, he looked ponderously out the windshield for a moment. “I never thought I’d have a reason to quote that movie like this,” he mused, but then his anger snapped right back to the same level it was before, and he stabbed his finger at me. “You listen here, you spineless little shit. I don’t want to hear another word of that goddamn selfless crap of yours again. Not one more word. What happened tonight? My fault for making you come there. Alice’s fault for not paying attention to the future. Jasper’s fault for not thinking to hold his breath.” He poked me hard in the chest. “Not. Yours. I’m sick and tired of that fucking act of yours, taking all the blame on yourself because it makes you look noble. Well, newsflash, sweetcheeks! It doesn’t! It makes you look like the pathetic, clingy, gutless pissant you are.”

I practically writhed under his horribly piercing gaze, about to burst into tears at the horribly savage words he was flinging at me, but he didn’t seem about to stop.

“Do you think that taking all of the blame on yourself is a good way to show your love for me? Is that it? Oh, look at you, taking all the blame of something that is at least partially my fault onto yourself, doesn’t that just make you look so noble and loving.” He whipped his head to the side and spat out my window before turning back to me. “That wispy voice of yours makes me sick, you know that? If I could still vomit, I probably would have when you said that.”

I turned horribly red as his voice suddenly went up about three octaves and cracked. “‘Oh, please forgive me, I beg you to say you forgive me for being just so pathetically human!’ Your humanity is one of the things I love about you, you stupid bitch!” he roared. “Are you really that dense and stupid that you don’t get it?! What the hell is the matter with you?!”

I tried to say something, but only wound up shrieking again when he suddenly stomped on the accelerator and the truck lurched forward again. He was grinding his teeth so hard I could hear it. I took a few calming breaths and finally found my voice again. “Edward,” I managed, my voice unsteady, “I’m sorry that—”

And then he was screaming again. “STOP!! APOLOGIZING!!” he bellowed in my face, causing me to flinch backwards. “Goddammit!” The truck came to a screeching halt once more, and then Edward was flinging his seatbelt off and throwing the door open.

“Where are you going?!” I shrieked.

“I’m going home! And if you’re so codependent that you can’t handle one fucking night without me, do us all a favor and roll over and DIE!!!!!” he screamed, and in a flash, he was gone, his constant stream of curse words fading rapidly into the night.

Comments

[hyperactivator.livejournal.com]

You tell her.

[amadris.livejournal.com]

Loved this the first time, love it still. I just hate it that Ed would never really call Bella out for her BS, like in this one. That might be because he doesn't have balls. I think the only times he really was angry with here when she wouldn't do as he said.

[melissatreglia]

Whoo! Badass!Edward in the house! LOL! This is just hysterical!