Spitefic: A Secretary Is Not A Toy

[gehayi.livejournal.com]

Title: A Secretary Is Not A Toy
Author: das_mervin
Fandom(s): Twilight (1st book)
Rating: G
Word Count: 390
Inspiration: Written in response to Edward dazzling Mrs. Cope, the Forks High secretary, into submission so he could skip school with Bella in chapter five.

I heard Edward speaking softly at the counter.

“Ms. Cope?”

“Yes?” I hadn’t heard her return to her desk.

“Bella has Gym next hour, and I don’t think she feels well enough. Actually, I was thinking I should take her home now. Do you think you could excuse her from class?” His voice was like melting honey. I could imagine how much more overwhelming his eyes would be.

There was a slight pause. “Is there any particular reason you need to take her home?” she asked, and I could hear shuffling papers.

“Well, I don’t think she is well enough to drive. Surely excusing us both won’t be a problem—Mrs. Goff will be all right with it,” he smoldered.

There was another pause, and I could tell that Edward was unleashing the full intensity of his gaze upon the older woman.

“You offering to drive her home wouldn’t have anything to do with the fact that you would get out of class as well, would it?” Mrs. Cope’s voice was dry.

Now it was Edward’s turn to pause. But he recovered quickly. “Not at all,” he said smoothly. “I would be able to return quickly enough after taking her home—she doesn’t live far—”

“You should probably wait for Lee to recover enough as well, then, so you can take him home, too,” Mrs. Cope interrupted sarcastically. “I will have the nurse write Bella a note to exclude her from Gym and she can sit in the stands—you can go back to class now while she waits here,” she continued.

“But she is very unwell,” Edward pressed, his voice soft and alluring.

“And you aren’t. Get back to class,” she said sharply.

Edward must have been about to speak again, because Mrs. Cope raised her voice. “Mr. Cullen,” she said icily, “your attendance record is appalling as it is, and I am not legally allowed to just let you take off whenever you want with whomever you want. I assure you that Mrs. Goff would mind if you just skipped class. We all mind when you skip class. You’re going to be lucky to graduate with the attendance you have now.”

I finally opened my eyes, shocked and confused. I could tell from Edward’s silence that he was equally taken aback. I looked up just in time to see Mrs. Cope shutting a drawer and turning to look back at him, glaring.

“And you’d better stop giving me that look—we’re not going to settle this with a staring contest,” she added crossly. “Get to class. Now, or it’s a week’s detention. Bella, I’ll get your note.”

And without another look at Edward, she swept back into the nurse’s office.

Comments

[hyperactivator.livejournal.com]

Very nice. No real school offical would be let an underaged boy take off with an underaged girl just because he asked and was attractive. Not even Feriss Bueller could pull that off.

[amadris.livejournal.com]

Not just that, but no real school offical would let any student just ditch when ever they feel like it. I think it was Jessica who explained that the Cullens ditch the school every time sun comes out, including the dear doctor.

Maybe I've just had particularly strict teachers and other school officials, but not once would they approve of ditching a class. You had to be really sick or have some kind of severe family situation to be allowed to do such thing. And what of Carlisle? I'm sure his patient with a difficult medical situation approves when the doc doesn't show up for their appointment because he needed to go out camping. Meyer clearly shows in the original bit how poorly she understands how things work when you have a job.

This spitefic illustrates very well how a real school offical would react to a teenboy trying to sneak out. Sure, Ed might be pretty beyond belief, but still it is kind of inappropriate of Meyer to make the secretary drool after him. I really love the way your version of the secretary calls Wardo out for his bullshit.

[yemi-hikari.livejournal.com]

There is such a day as Senior Ditch Day. Some teachers are against it and made it clear that the students ditching would be marked absent, while others simply concidered it a yearly tradition and a one time thing.

But what we are talking about here is a case where it is multiple times the kids skip classes which usually results in a visit to the home if the person is concidered a minor... which, since he is supposed to be acting sixteen, he would be. If anyone wants to use that, feel free too.

[yemi-hikari.livejournal.com]

This is very much true. The only reason I know of that a teacher would make the exception to the rule is when the two are actually related and/or there was prior arrangement set up by the parents and it was a BIG emergency.

[melissatreglia]

I love this; this is exactly how a REAL school secretary would react!