Spitefic: A Story of More Woe
Jan. 25th, 2011 04:03 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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twispiteficTitle: A Story of More Woe
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
gehayi
Fandom(s): New Moon
Rating: PG
Word Count: 750
Chapter Inspiration: Chapter 1 – Party
Author’s Note: Written in response to Bella thinking Edward envied Romeo just because Juliet was pretty.
* * * * * * *
“I do sort of envy him here.”
“She’s very pretty.”
Edward stared. “I envy him his mortality. Not Juliet, and certainly not that pointless suicide.”
“It’s not pointless, it’s romantic!” I protested. “Romeo and Juliet are so much in love that they can’t live without each other.”
“Oh, they are not,” Edward snapped. “At the beginning of the play, Romeo was spouting the same drivel about Rosaline Capulet that he later did about Juliet. The only difference is that Rosaline didn’t listen to Romeo’s hyperbole, and Juliet did. Which isn’t surprising, since Juliet’s thirteen. You can’t expect her to know better.”
I was starting to get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. “But…but look. They fell in love instantly.”
He snorted. “Rosaline had refused Romeo yet again when he crashed the Capulets’ party. Consciously or subconsciously, he was looking for a new girl. Juliet was young and she was a Capulet. Romeo fetishizes Capulets. He could marry any woman in Verona; he fixates on two women whose family hates him. I get the feeling that if they weren’t Capulets, he wouldn’t be interested.”
The sick feeling grew worse. If Edward was my Romeo and he had a fetish for humans...well, this didn’t bode well for my becoming a vampire.
“And they hardly spent any time together,” he continued. “They meet at the party and recite a sonnet, and then they talk in the balcony scene. The next day, Romeo goes to Friar Laurence to arrange a secret marriage—which is selfish, since if Juliet gets pregnant, no one will believe that she’s married. And after the same-day wedding, they have sex for one night. The next day, Romeo gets himself banished from Verona after Juliet’s ex-fiancé kills Romeo’s lover, Mercutio—”
“What!” I didn’t like the idea of this parallel at all.
He peered at me, surprised. “Well, it’s obvious, isn’t it? Mercutio is always around. He’s been part of Romeo’s life for a long time. He can convince his bipolar friend to try things and enjoy life even when Romeo isn’t inclined to do either.
“When Tybalt kills Mercutio, everything goes to Hell. Because Mercutio is the one who can get Romeo to control himself and step back when everything seems hopeless—and that’s not easy with a depressive. Juliet never has that effect. And when Romeo doesn’t have Mercutio around, he falls into spiraling depression. He’s almost ready to kill himself when he’s banished, and again when he just hears a rumor that Juliet’s dead. That’s not true love. It’s guilt. Juliet’s supposed death was the last straw...but it was Mercutio who died because Romeo got in the way during a swordfight. And it was Mercutio who died in Romeo’s arms.”
“And who’s your Mercutio?” That sounded far nastier than I had intended.
He didn’t even hesitate. “Carlisle.”
“But—but he’s your father!”
“Not biologically,” he pointed out. “Don’t look so surprised. Didn’t the fact that a handsome doctor would climb in bed with a dying seventeen-year-old boy and turn him into a vampire as well tell you anything? We were a couple for decades before Esme showed up.”
He sighed. “That was really the beginning of the end. He did try to explain to her that how he felt about me had nothing to do with how he felt about her, but she’s never comprehended that very well. The only thought that did get through was the possibility that I might be gay—and that was only reinforced when I wanted nothing to do with Rosalie.
“That’s why Esme was so happy when you showed up. Not because she cares about my happiness or yours, but because she fears that without you, someday I’ll steal Carlisle back. As far as she’s concerned, your soul being annihilated is a price worth paying to keep me away from my lover.”
I felt as if I were strangling. “Your family doesn’t care about me at all?”
“Not really,” he said calmly. “Rosalie hates both of us, Esme has seen me as a threat for years, Emmett thinks that I should just have sex with you before I feed, Carlisle sees you—inevitably—as a rival, Alice wants to start a lesbian affair with you as soon as you’re turned, and Jasper thinks of you as a midnight snack.”
“And what about you?” I said through nearly paralyzed lips. “Do you love me?”
He smiled sweetly. “Bella, I love you every bit as much as Romeo loved Rosaline.”
Author:
gehayiFandom(s): New Moon
Rating: PG
Word Count: 750
Chapter Inspiration: Chapter 1 – Party
Author’s Note: Written in response to Bella thinking Edward envied Romeo just because Juliet was pretty.
“I do sort of envy him here.”
“She’s very pretty.”
Edward stared. “I envy him his mortality. Not Juliet, and certainly not that pointless suicide.”
“It’s not pointless, it’s romantic!” I protested. “Romeo and Juliet are so much in love that they can’t live without each other.”
“Oh, they are not,” Edward snapped. “At the beginning of the play, Romeo was spouting the same drivel about Rosaline Capulet that he later did about Juliet. The only difference is that Rosaline didn’t listen to Romeo’s hyperbole, and Juliet did. Which isn’t surprising, since Juliet’s thirteen. You can’t expect her to know better.”
I was starting to get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. “But…but look. They fell in love instantly.”
He snorted. “Rosaline had refused Romeo yet again when he crashed the Capulets’ party. Consciously or subconsciously, he was looking for a new girl. Juliet was young and she was a Capulet. Romeo fetishizes Capulets. He could marry any woman in Verona; he fixates on two women whose family hates him. I get the feeling that if they weren’t Capulets, he wouldn’t be interested.”
The sick feeling grew worse. If Edward was my Romeo and he had a fetish for humans...well, this didn’t bode well for my becoming a vampire.
“And they hardly spent any time together,” he continued. “They meet at the party and recite a sonnet, and then they talk in the balcony scene. The next day, Romeo goes to Friar Laurence to arrange a secret marriage—which is selfish, since if Juliet gets pregnant, no one will believe that she’s married. And after the same-day wedding, they have sex for one night. The next day, Romeo gets himself banished from Verona after Juliet’s ex-fiancé kills Romeo’s lover, Mercutio—”
“What!” I didn’t like the idea of this parallel at all.
He peered at me, surprised. “Well, it’s obvious, isn’t it? Mercutio is always around. He’s been part of Romeo’s life for a long time. He can convince his bipolar friend to try things and enjoy life even when Romeo isn’t inclined to do either.
“When Tybalt kills Mercutio, everything goes to Hell. Because Mercutio is the one who can get Romeo to control himself and step back when everything seems hopeless—and that’s not easy with a depressive. Juliet never has that effect. And when Romeo doesn’t have Mercutio around, he falls into spiraling depression. He’s almost ready to kill himself when he’s banished, and again when he just hears a rumor that Juliet’s dead. That’s not true love. It’s guilt. Juliet’s supposed death was the last straw...but it was Mercutio who died because Romeo got in the way during a swordfight. And it was Mercutio who died in Romeo’s arms.”
“And who’s your Mercutio?” That sounded far nastier than I had intended.
He didn’t even hesitate. “Carlisle.”
“But—but he’s your father!”
“Not biologically,” he pointed out. “Don’t look so surprised. Didn’t the fact that a handsome doctor would climb in bed with a dying seventeen-year-old boy and turn him into a vampire as well tell you anything? We were a couple for decades before Esme showed up.”
He sighed. “That was really the beginning of the end. He did try to explain to her that how he felt about me had nothing to do with how he felt about her, but she’s never comprehended that very well. The only thought that did get through was the possibility that I might be gay—and that was only reinforced when I wanted nothing to do with Rosalie.
“That’s why Esme was so happy when you showed up. Not because she cares about my happiness or yours, but because she fears that without you, someday I’ll steal Carlisle back. As far as she’s concerned, your soul being annihilated is a price worth paying to keep me away from my lover.”
I felt as if I were strangling. “Your family doesn’t care about me at all?”
“Not really,” he said calmly. “Rosalie hates both of us, Esme has seen me as a threat for years, Emmett thinks that I should just have sex with you before I feed, Carlisle sees you—inevitably—as a rival, Alice wants to start a lesbian affair with you as soon as you’re turned, and Jasper thinks of you as a midnight snack.”
“And what about you?” I said through nearly paralyzed lips. “Do you love me?”
He smiled sweetly. “Bella, I love you every bit as much as Romeo loved Rosaline.”
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Date: 2011-03-28 09:15 pm (UTC)The difference? Billy Shakespeare was too smart and too capable a playwright to pen some generic love story, without a hard dose of reality in it... and SMeyer can't write worth a damn.
(The fucking gall of that woman, thinking she can do better! She's not fit to spit-shine his coffin!)